Louise Lague, MA NCC / 

National Certified Counselor

Specializing in Midlife Issues

• Divorce
• Care of elderly parents
• Adult orphanhood
• Empty nest
• Disillusionment or dismissal at work
• Relationship problems
• Loneliness
• Lack of motivation

These are normal, but difficult areas of adult life. In most cases, I can have you feeling better about life in one session, and reinforce and solidify well-being in a few subsequent visits. You are meant to be a self-forgiving, fulfilled, authentic, and joyous person. That is within reach. 

THE FRISKY GEEZER MAKES ITS DEBUT!

We've been working on a Frisky Geezer book for men and women of a certain age who want to have more fun. (Fun is good for you!) The book isn't finished, the website, though is ready: here you'll enjoy a combination of practical ideas and psychological boosting from my partner Tom Lichty and myself. Also you can tune into our adventure blog and get sneak peeks of the book as it's being written. Let me know what you think here.

Location, Location, Location:

My office is now back at The Northwest Counseling Center, on NW 21st, between Johnson and Kearney, in Portland, OR. Parking is easy to find during the day.

 DIVORCE GROUP:

 My colleague Martha Darkens and I are starting a divorce support group. Men and women both can join in. Time and place will be set according to the group's availability. Interested? Send me an email here.

.

Thoughts for February

The Valentine Blues

I was flipping through the February issue of a women's magazine the other day, when I saw this phrase in the editor’s letter: "Whether you are partnered or not," she writes, Valentine’s Day is “equally irritating, anxiety provoking, cloying and –at its worst-an all- out emotional minefield-packed day no matter how you look at it.”

An ugly thought. But I do know what she means. Valentine's Day has always been a bit of a popularity contest. Remember counting valentines in school? How many did you get? You got more than I did. Nobody loves me. Worm-eating time. 

At the very worst, your mother gave you a valentine card. 

The adult version of this worm-eating exercise is walking through February without a significant other while all about us the marketplace is pushing chocolates, roses, diamonds, romantic restaurants,  boxer shorts emblazoned with little red hearts, and pink lingerie. Gifts you could be getting from, or giving to  your lover. But you don't have one. So you feel absolutely wretched.

Enough. I checked into the history of Valentine's Day, (too boring to paraphrase here) but it has nothing to do with romantic love. It has more to do with people needing a holiday in the middle of February, and it has been thus for many, many generations. 

 Here's more: The average adult has spent a great many Valentine's Day without a significant other, and survived it.

I've done them both ways during my lifetime, but I only remember one Valentine's Day at all clearly. My friend Judy, newly widowed, and I, newly divorced, spent Valentine's Day in Naples, Florida. We had both been partnered in February for some 25 years, and now...not. After failing to find a restaurant that had an available table for two, we got on one of those dinner cruise boats, witnessed a wedding aboard, and went on to share champagne with the bride and groom.